| Bunny | Monday, August 13, 2001 - 09:52 pm 
Bunny Tales
August 10, 2001
While the house is in an uproar in the wee hours of Friday, Ophelia begins to destroy an entire loaf of bread. This takes me back to the good old days when Shannon was doing the same thing.
Will asks Nicole, "Did I ever tell you about that cancer banner?" Then he proceeds to tell her the story of being overheard talking to Shannon by the internet; however, he intentionally leaves out the part about faking cancer to gain sympathy from the other HGs. Now that's the Will we all know and love - love to hate, that is.
America's Choice question involves choosing something for the backyard: a swing, new grass, a swing set, a trampoline. Will thinks the old folks watching will vote for a swing. Yes, then we can watch the HGs move from smoking on the patio to smoking on the swing. Even the old folks want more excitement on TV than that.
Will is perplexed about Bunky's choice: new grass. It doesn't surprise me, since sitting around watching grass grow is pretty much what we've come to expect from you people.
Will says that Bunky is really a nice guy. He says that he is going to try and win the next luxury challenge for Bunky. Try all you like, Will, but Bunky's heart belongs to Daddy.
When Bunky awakens, Hardy lets him know that he missed alot of excitement the night before. "Like what?" Hardy says, "F*** you, voluntary exit, f*** you." (Best Line of the Day)
Bunky apologizes to Ophelia for not saying "Good morning" to her. Good move, Bunk. We all know where that got Kent last week.
The food competition is about to take place. It consists of finding a plastic letter of the alphabet buried in a gigantic bowl of cereal, then naming all the foods you can think of that start with that letter within a one-minute time limit.
First up is Will, who draws out an "F" and calls out fish, French fries, and frog legs to name a few. Monica chooses "H" and goes with honey, hot dogs, and ham. Krista takes most of her alloted time choosing a letter and gets only 15 seconds to name foods that start with "S." She goes with salami, salmon, and soda. Hardy gets a "B" and remembers to get beer. Bunky draws a "G" and lists grapes and ground beef.
Second round brings a "P" for Will, who orders alot of pink things and anything and everything containing protein. I'm assuming he left pig's feet and pork rinds off his list out of respect for Ophelia.
Monica draws an "E" and lists eggs, eggplant, egg nog, egg substitute. She also puts the Easter bunny on her list (Wha?) - I guess because with all those egg products she's ordering, somebunny's gotta carry 'em.
Krista gets an "R" and wants some roast beef, rice, and reefer. America's Sweetheart adds drugs to the grocery list.
Hardy takes a "T" and wants tomatoes and turnips. Bunky buys milk, mustard, and mayo with his "M" and seems to be pondering whether or not "man meat" would be allowed.
After the food challenge, Krista and Monica relax on the patio and Krista picks up where she left off in terms of her impending Voluntary Exit. She wants to leave before Nicole makes the nominations. Monica nods alot, but does not try to talk her out of leaving. I see a little bubble pop up over Monica's head with a picture in it of Bunky packing his bags.
The others are discussing who they should vote out. There will not be another nomination for two weeks. Nicole says, "Ultimately, you have to figure out who you want to spend the next couple of weeks with." Bunky: "I hate to say it, but I don't think I can live another three weeks with Monica saying 'It's on!'"
Will says that Monica told him about thirty times that it was "on," and he asked her how he could turn it off.
Hardy says he put his picture on am-i-hot-or-not.com. Not cool, Hardy. Pull another one like that and I'll put your picture on coulda-had-Bunny-but-not-no-more.com.
Nicole receives a shirt from her husband as an HOH gift. She likes it because it smells like him. In a house filled with men who fart at will, this must be a welcome relief.
She also receives massage oil. (Ahh, Bunny will soon be replacing Miss Cleo on the Psychic Network.)
First banner of the day: J & KR KINKY KNIFE PLAY XPELS J. Krista still doesn't get it. Hey, banner fliers. You could have combined the cost of Knife Banners 1 & 2 and just put it all right out there: J PUT KNIFE 2 KR NEK & KR 2 BLITZT 2 RMEMBR IT. PS BUNNY WLL CUT OUT (heart) 4 H.
Another banner: NET C'S KR DRUNK & DICTATING NOMS HOPE UR GAWN. I think the person who wrote the script for this banner had hit the ol' whiskey bottle a bit himself before sending it. First of all, KR DRUNK....this is news? DICTATING NOMS...um, wrong girl. HOPE UR GAWN....well, you could have spelled it right for the same amount of dollars. I'm just sayin'...
Monica and Krista are sitting at the table outside. Krista says she thinks Will betrayed her. Monica, in Friend Protection mode, calls Will over. "Krista is very upset and I think you got something to do with it. I know this makes you feel uncomfortable - she's my friend and I have to do this." I want to remind Monica and Krista that they didn't like it when Kent spoke for Bunky. What's good for the goose...
Krista mainly just wants to talk about Boogie and mentions something about Will "punkin' out" and not watching her back...blah blah blah...spooning with Boogie...blah blah blah...you didn't take up for Shannon...blah blah blah...Boogie Fever...blah blah blah...you're a liar and I can't trust you...blah blah blah....Boogie's gone and I'm so alone, I have nobody to call my own, I'm so lonesome I could cry...blah blah blah.
Will wants to take the discussion inside, where Krista admits to the UT (Untouchables) alliance between herself, Hardy, and Monica. She says it was just a group of people trying to stay out of trouble. (Then why didn't you call it OT?) Nicole is offended because they didn't ask her to play.
Nicole makes her nominations, sticking to her plan to nominate Monica and Krista. Monica heads to her room to pack. (Nothing like getting an early start when you're about to take a trip.) Krista cries and tells Nicole she feels like she is getting "the s*** end of the deal" with all the hate banners. I agree with Krista. I think there should be Equal Opportunity Banner Bashing.
Bunky and Will are talking about how Monica blew up when she was nominated after she said she would handle it with grace. Yikes! I'm having a Kent flashback.
Krista talks about the knife banner. She is afraid that someone is going to try and stab her. Maybe she's living in Backward World and the knife thing with Justin hasn't happened yet.
Another banner, and believe it or not it has nothing to do with Krista whatsoever: WE (heart) NICS BROWS/LIPS NICSLIPS.COM I'm wondering about the sanity of someone who would dedicate an entire web site to anyone's lips, but then I remember my crush on Mick Jagger and I move along.
BB rewards the HGs with a cake for making it halfway through the BB game. I think they should give me a cake for still halfway caring what happens to these people.
Will thinks the next luxury challenge will be about current events. Nicole says she doesn't care about anything that is happening in the world except the show. I can relate.
Krista tells a sad tale about being alone one Christmas when she was a child. It's a heartbreaker and Bunny will make sure she's never alone on Easter from now on.
Nicole tells Will that she wants to make Monica stay. "Anyone who packs her bags an hour after nomination should be made to stay." Krista will go. But, Nicole - did you hear that pitiful Christmas story Krista just told? New banner: Nicole is the Grinch!
Krista offers to have a child for Bunky and his husband. I guess this would be one way to offset the loss of the half mill. And, lucky for Bunky, she might even take payment in stimulants.
Hardy stumbles sleepily into the bathroom, but seems to forget to direct the stream into the toilet bowl. Will: "Dude, did you pee anywhere IN the toilet? It's all over the floor." I shudder to think that Hardy might be the Mystery Crapper. Please say it ain't so, Joe.
More tomorrow.
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