| Author |
Message |
Bunny
Member
09-01-2000
| Wednesday, September 01, 2004 - 6:15 pm 
The voice of Michael Jackson awakens the HGs this morning. It's too bad the music couldn't air over the internet because I'm sure the guy could use the income right now. Legal fees and all that. I really do hope they air the trial. I want to see how long it takes for Michael's nose to fall off under the hot lights. Who's responsible for keeping up with that thing anyway? You know it's the job of one person to put it on ice every night and putty it back onto his boss's face every morning. He's one of those guys you see in the entourage, ever present to watch for slippage or to stay behind and search if the prosthetic gets knocked off by a too-tight surgical mask. He gets paid well for his services, and the only qualification for the job was that he played nose guard in college.
Diane wants to know why they have to get up so early. Karen tells her the internet people need something to watch. Diane says, "Screw the internet people!" Which is probably what I would say, too, if I had Drew in my bed.
Adria is in the bathroom, getting ready for the day. Diane walks in and Adria wishes her "Good morning!" Diane runs back to the bedroom to tell Drew, "I don't think I can make it through the day. Adria has already started. She just told me 'Good morning!'"
Yeah, I know what you mean, Diane. Every time that happens to me, it just ruins my whole freakin' week. I don't want anybody at any time wishing me any good mornings or good evenings or good lucks. The nerve of that girl.
Drew has no problem talking to Adria, and they have a nice conversation in the kitchen while the girls are outside. Adria tells Drew that her words and intentions are often misconstrued in the house, so she guesses it's better if she doesn't say anything at all. I hear you on that, girlfriend. If someone can read venom into "Good morning!," then you best stay out of the way.
Karen and Nokomis have a moment without Diane to discuss her role in their game strategy.
Karen: Her quick flip in loyalty freaks me out. She will never put Drew up. She says a lot of things that scare me. I told her I wasn't going to use the Veto since I was afraid Drew would go up, and I told Drew, too - but she told Drew I hadn't made up my mind, trying to make him nervous. That worries me.
Funny thing is, Karen, you don't know the half of it. She's flipped between alliances like hamburgers on a George Foreman. They call her Flipper, Flipper, faster than lightning, from singles to twins, she's working those fins.
Karen: We can't backdoor Marvin. It would make Diane look good at our expense. I have a bad feeling she will never put him up.
Karen stops talking when Diane walks up.
Diane: Where is SHE?
Karen: Adria? In the kitchen.
Diane: I have to play it smart and keep away from her.
Nokomis: Yeah, I heard she wished you "Good morning!" today.
Diane: I'm still reeling from that. The nerve, right?
Nokomis: Totally.
Karen: I tried to be nice to her yesterday, but all she did was talk bad about us. (Huh??)
Diane: I will kick the door when she walks out. She was staring at me last night. (Huh??) She's a b-tch.
Karen: She will go home and look at her own behavior and be embarrassed. (Huh??)
Nokomis: She hasn't spoken to me in two weeks. All of America will think she's a nasty person. (Huh??)
Remind me to never, and I do mean, NEVER, say "Good morning!" to anyone ever again. It's just not worth the price you have to pay.
BB gives the HGs paper so that they can compose a letter to be read on "House Calls" to the internet viewers. Marvin says, "Marcellas hosts the show."
Cowboy: They keep bringing him back.
Bunny: Yeah, I know. Last year as part of a competition, and now this year on an internet show. It's All Marcellas All the Time. I want to see someone different. Like Hardy.
Cowboy: But Hardy would just lift weights and grunt.
Bunny: Yeah....so?
The HGs are told that the letter can contain no more than 100 characters. "Who wants to write it?," asks Marvin. Karen volunteers, even though Drew is the obvious choice. He could do the whole thing in ten letters or less. "We should start it out by saying, 'Dear Psycho Internet Freaks'," says Diane.
Okay, that does it. I let it go when you threw out "Screw the internet people!" You were tired, you were cranky, you were cuddled up with a hunk and didn't want us to spoil your fun, so I gave you the benefit of the doubt that you didn't mean to hurt our feelings. But now......nope, I can't let you slide by this time. Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, won't get fooled again.
Now, let me get this straight - you think WE are psycho freaks? And people like you who give up their jobs, their health insurance, their apartments, driving, reading, bathing in private, walking their dog, eating what they choose, time with family and friends, and complete freedom to live in the world in order to lock themselves up on a CBS studio lot for three months where they're watched by cameras 24 hours a day are NOT??
The HGs decide to address us as "stalkers" rather than "psycho freaks" in their letter, which is even more off track. That implies that we actually care about them after the game is over. I feel compelled to fire off a note of my own:
Dear BB Contestants,
You are entertainment. Period. I do not care where you eat lunch, or what kind of car you drive, or if you prefer boxers or briefs. I only care about your game strategy and whether or not you read "Bunny Tales."
Yours for the season,
Bunny
Anyway, back to their letter. The HGs finish it and turn it over to BB:
Dear Stalkers,
We love you. Thanks for your support. Better you there than here. See you on the outside.
Love,
The Surviving 7
Diane says, "Soon to be six" right in front of Adria, which leads me to wonder where she eats lunch after all. Just kidding, Diane. I won't show up at your table to slap you for being so mean. What does Adria need me for anyway? She got a shotgun for Christmas.
Marvin is in charge of cooking dinner tonight and opts for chops of pork. The HGs sit down to eat and Cowboy realizes that no one called Adria to the table. He finds her in the exercise room and lets her know that it's time "fer suppah." She joins the others and comments to Marvin, "These pork chops are delicious!" Marvin thanks her (it's tough pork, but somebody's got to chew it) and after that, Adria is pretty much ignored. She goes outside, where Cowboy joins her.
Adria: I just wish people would talk to me.
Cowboy: I'm sorry about the way they've been treating you.
Adria decides to go back inside to finish the workout she started before dinner. Drew is in there, and Adria asks for an update on the game.
Adria: What's the word?
Drew: From what I hear, everyone's trying to kick you out. (You AND the door.)
Adria: No one has acknowledged me all week long.
Drew: I told them that. I said it's a game, and they're acting immature.
Adria: Even Cowboy wasn't talking to me. He said he was just homesick.
Drew: Cowboy has an excuse for everything. (I don't know about that. I don't think I've heard Reason One for why he keeps pulling his rabbit out of his hat. Or putting a hat on his rabbit. Or whatever.)
Adria: They even talked to Jase, and they thought he was Satan. Last night, I just asked about your relationship, and Diane got all pissed off, saying she didn't want me all up in her business.
Drew: Crazy, huh, considering all her business is being shown worldwide all over the internet.
Adria: That's just what Bunny said.
Drew: I suppose you wonder why I'm voting with the group. I have to look out for what's best for me in the game. Diane is the ringleader.
Adria: Her alliance with Nokomis and Karen is strong. I don't even talk about the twin alliance anymore.
Drew: Diane kissed Marvin.
Adria: I saw Marvin rubbing all over her on the couch last night and thought it was a little much.
Drew: Cowboy saw them kissing and told me. I waited to see if she would mention it. I asked her if there was anything she wanted to tell me. She slowly backed into it. She was all up in Marvin's butt last week, but now she wants to get rid of him.
I have a hunch that being up in Marvin's butt is way better than being up in Marvin's shoes, but I really don't want to over-analyze it. It's fodder for anyone who might want to call me a "psycho internet freak," and I've had enough of that for one day.
Hoppy trails,
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